{"id":5113,"date":"2017-12-08T21:49:15","date_gmt":"2017-12-08T21:49:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/?p=5113"},"modified":"2017-12-11T15:51:14","modified_gmt":"2017-12-11T15:51:14","slug":"me-too-rape-sexual-assault","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/stories\/me-too-rape-sexual-assault\/","title":{"rendered":"#MeToo: Now What?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/piXMzJfKIDE\" width=\"600\" height=\"543\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p><em>By Evy Yeager<\/em><br \/>\n<em>December 8, 2017<\/em><\/p>\n<p>The following is a speech for the #MeToo rally on\u00a0December 9, 2017, hosted by NOW NYC.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-5114\" src=\"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What.png\" alt=\"#MeToo: Now What?\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" srcset=\"https:\/\/safehorizon.wpenginepowered.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What.png 960w, https:\/\/safehorizon.wpenginepowered.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/safehorizon.wpenginepowered.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What-768x432.png 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>\u201c<em>The ordinary response to atrocities is to banish them from consciousness. Certain violations are too terrible to utter aloud. Atrocities, however, refuse to be buried.<\/em>\u201d These are the words of Judith Herman, pioneer of trauma research and one of the first voices that made me feel seen and heard when I felt myself disappearing.<\/p>\n<p>My abuser was hurting women and girls in my family and community since before I was born. I was sexually abused even before I was forming memories. It brought a horrifying feeling of the inevitable &#8212; the girls and women before me said #MeToo in their own ways, but nothing changed. I took my place among them.\u00a0 When it\u2019s happening to everyone around you, how do you convince someone that it must end here? How do you convince yourself that it\u2019s even possible?<\/p>\n<p>In 2011 I moved to New York City and went to Safe Horizon, the nation\u2019s largest victim services agency. They guided me through the legal process, supported me with expert trauma therapy, and never let me feel alone. I now have the honor of working for Safe Horizon as part of the Communications Team, and am part of our Speakers Bureau of former clients who advocate for the rights of survivors. In this and many other ways, I am incredibly fortunate. Each year Safe Horizon touches the lives of over 250,000 survivors of violence, crime, and abuse offering counseling and essential advocacy. We operate 24-hour hotlines to offer support, information, and expertise. Whether you are in crisis or you are unsure if your experience constitutes crime or abuse, Safe Horizon is here for you.<\/p>\n<p>I think we all have stories of the negative responses we\u2019ve gotten when we\u2019ve said \u201c<em>Me, too.<\/em>\u201d Each one piles on top of us, and makes it a little harder to climb out from under the debris. But the good ones lighten the load. For everyone here who has said #MeToo and been met with doubt, blame, or other forms of rejection&#8211; know that you will also find people who will believe and support you. Some of them are standing next to you today.<\/p>\n<p>We should honor these hard-won victories, but also not congratulate ourselves too soon. There is so much left to do. People are saying that the movement is not over until we include women of color, or until we talk about LGBTQ assaults, and so on. Let\u2019s be very clear: until we include everyone equitably, #MeToo has not truly <em>begun<\/em>. It is possible to be victimized and still have privileges that others lack: the privilege to be heard, to be believed, to be supported, and to be valued. The voices we can barely hear right now are the ones we need to listen to the most.<\/p>\n<p>Sexual assault doesn\u2019t discriminate and neither should we. #MeToo has to include women of color, immigrants, LGBTQ, people living with disabilities, children and teenagers, the elderly, and yes, men and boys.<\/p>\n<p>We owe the success of this movement to Tarana Burke for starting this conversation, to the survivors who are talking, and to everyone who is listening. Thank you to the survivors who can\u2019t share their stories, or are choosing not to, who are celebrating this movement in their own quiet way. We see you, too.<\/p>\n<p>Thank you to Safe Horizon for supporting me and allowing me to join you in supporting others. Thank you NOW-NYC and my fellow speakers for their leadership and advocacy, and to you all for your fierce courage and truth-telling. There is only one way forward: <strong>Refuse to let ourselves, or each other, be buried. <\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Safe Horizon&#8217;s Evy Yeager discusses rape and sexual assault in her speech at the #MeToo rally hosted by NOW NYC.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":{"id":5114,"alt_text":"#MeToo: Now What?","caption":"","description":"","media_type":"image","media_details":{"width":960,"height":540,"file":"2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What.png","sizes":{"thumbnail":{"file":"Me-Too-Now-What-150x150.png","width":150,"height":150,"mime-type":"image\/png","source_url":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What-150x150.png"},"medium":{"file":"Me-Too-Now-What-300x169.png","width":300,"height":169,"mime-type":"image\/png","source_url":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What-300x169.png"},"medium_large":{"file":"Me-Too-Now-What-768x432.png","width":768,"height":432,"mime-type":"image\/png","source_url":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What-768x432.png"}},"image_meta":{"aperture":"0","credit":"","camera":"","caption":"","created_timestamp":"0","copyright":"","focal_length":"0","iso":"0","shutter_speed":"0","title":"","orientation":"0","keywords":[]}},"post":5113,"source_url":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Me-Too-Now-What.png"},"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[45],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5113","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories","issue-rape-and-sexual-assault"],"acf":{"page_header_title":"","page_header_image":false,"original_url":"","related_initiative_title":"How do we help survivors of rape and sexual assault?","related_initiative_link":"\/get-help\/rape-and-sexual-assault","related_initiative_link_text":"Learn about our services","featured_posts":[{"ID":1369,"post_author":"12","post_date":"2016-05-26 00:00:00","post_date_gmt":"2016-05-26 00:00:00","post_content":"<em><em>*Warning: This story contains details of a sexual assault that some readers may find disturbing<\/em>.<\/em>\r\n\r\n<center><img class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-2610\" src=\"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/Donna-Will-Never-Forget-How-Eri-Kim-Helped-Her.png\" alt=\"Donna Will Never Forget How Eri Kim Helped Her\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" \/><\/center>\r\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\u201c<em>I will never forget the first thing that *Eri said to me when I sat down with her for my first counseling session, <strong> \u2018You are never alone and it is not your fault\u2019<\/strong><\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\r\nFor *Donna, those words came at a time when she needed to hear them most. Before meeting Eri, Donna was suffering recurring and traumatic memories of being sexually and physically assaulted around her office building and felt extremely alone.\r\n\r\nPeople respond very differently to trauma caused by sexual assault. Donna responded to the trauma by avoiding the overwhelming negative responses that flooded her thoughts. \u201c<em>I first avoided going to a place like Safe Horizon because I did not want to talk about what I had experienced and how that horrible attack had affected me and affected my life.<\/em>\u201d\r\n\r\nNow Donna looks back and is grateful she came to Safe Horizon and met Eri. <em>\u201cBefore Safe Horizon, I felt helpless and hopeless. Eri\u2019s words gave me a positive outlook for my future. I have something to look forward to every time we meet because I believe that she is not just a social worker, but someone who genuinely cared about me as a person.\u201d<\/em>\r\n\r\n<center><img class=\"size-full wp-image-2538 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/Safe-Horizons-Community-Programs.png\" alt=\"Safe Horizon's Community Programs\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" \/><\/center>&nbsp;\r\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em><em><em>Safe Horizon\u2019s Community Programs support, educate, and advocate for victims of crime and abuse including rape and sexual assault.<\/em><\/em>\r\n<\/em><\/p>\r\n\r\n<h1>\u201cSomeone who Genuinely Cared about Me\u201d<\/h1>\r\nDonna met Eri at our Brooklyn Community Program. Serving all five boroughs of New York City, each warm and welcoming Community Program supports, educates, and advocates for all victims of crime and abuse, including rape and sexual assault. Since Donna found it difficult to open up, Eri reassured her that she would fully support her. <em>\u201cEri provided me with tools, resources, and information that helped me cope with my recurring memories of that horrible experience.<\/em>\u201d\r\n\r\nAs Donna\u2019s story illustrates, recovering from a traumatic event takes time, and everyone heals at his or her own pace. Safe Horizon integrates trauma-informed techniques in working with individuals who encounter all types of crime and violence. Our staff utilize a variety of \u201cgrounding\u201d techniques that can be used for people who are dealing with feelings of reliving past trauma to remind them that they are in a safe place.\u00a0The techniques can help individuals cope with the emotional pain caused by something happening in the present that reminds them of the past traumatic event.\r\n\r\nEri guided Donna through a grounding technique to help Donna connect to her physical body and stay in the present moment. Donna says the technique was instrumental to her healing, \u201c<em>exercises like grounding have changed my life and how I handle uncomfortable, anxious, or depressing situations.<\/em>\u201d\r\n\r\n<center><img class=\"size-full wp-image-2539 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/Social-Workers-like-Eri-Provide-Surrportive-Counseling-and-Advocacy-Services.png\" alt=\"Social Workers like Eri Provide Surrportive Counseling and Advocacy Services\" width=\"600\" height=\"400\" \/><\/center>\r\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em><em><em>Social workers like Eri work at every Community Program, providing supportive counseling and advocacy services<em>.<\/em><\/em><\/em><\/em><\/p>\r\n\r\n<h1>From Victim to Victor<\/h1>\r\nDonna says she has re-claimed her positive outlook and is looking forward to moving on with her life.<em> \u201cSince I started talking with Eri, I feel better about myself. I went back to living my life the way it was before I was attacked. I wake up in the morning and<em> plan to do something special for myself every day.\"\r\n<\/em><\/em>\r\n\r\n<em><span class=\"footnote\">* Client names and identifying information have been changed to protect their privacy. Images used are representations of Safe Horizon\u2019s clients<\/span>.<\/em>","post_title":"Donna\u2019s Story: You are Never Alone and it is Not Your Fault","post_excerpt":"After experiencing sexual assault, Donna suffered severe trauma reactions until she came to one of our Community Program and found help and support.","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"donnas-story-you-are-never-alone-and-it-is-not-your-fault","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2017-10-03 17:21:21","post_modified_gmt":"2017-10-03 17:21:21","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"http:\/\/safehorizon.dev\/uncategorized-en\/donnas-story-you-are-never-alone-and-it-is-not-your-fault\/","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}]},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v24.5 (Yoast SEO v26.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>#Me Too: Now What? 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