![\"MaeOla](\"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/MaeOla-Bolton_Former-WNBA-Player-Comes-Forward-to-Help-Other-Childhood-Sexual-Abuse-Survivors.jpg\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
By Riley Huston MaeOla Bolton was born into a family destined for greatness. After all, her sister is Olympic Gold Medalist Ruthie Bolton. MaeOla was the 15th of 20 children and the daughter of a Baptist minister from Mississippi, nearly everyone in their small town of McLain (current population, 1,800) knew MaeOla and her siblings. At their family church, the Boltons not only ran the show, they were the show. The children made up the choir and their father led the sermons. The Bolton family was a staple and symbol of pride in their community.<\/p>\n MaeOla and her sister, Ruthie, loved basketball. It was their first love and a passion they shared with one another. \u201cWe played basketball all day and sang all night,<\/em>\u201d MaeOla says of their childhood.<\/p>\n MaeOla and Ruthie both played in high school and college. MaeOla played in the Professional European league in Italy and Spain, and Ruthie even went on to win gold in the 1996 and 2000 Olympic Games. MaeOla had desired to do the same, but a brutal car accident in 1993 stole that dream from her, leaving her with a broken neck and years of physical and emotional therapy. Yet, this car crash couldn\u2019t crush her determination. MaeOla recovered and went on to briefly play professionally in the WNBA. Sadly, complications from the accident forced her to walk away from the game entirely in 1998.<\/p>\n Despite the accolades, MaeOla and Ruthie both lived every day with a painful secret. Ruthie, a survivor of domestic violence, shared her story with us in 2016 as part of our campaign to end domestic violence, #PutTheNailinIt<\/a>. MaeOla helped us to coordinate the interviews and photoshoots with her sister. Little did we know that MaeOla had her own important story to tell.<\/p>\n MaeOla has since disclosed that one of her brothers sexually abused her during her adolescence. At Safe Horizon, we know that when a child is sexually abused, it’s almost always by someone known to the victim and with easy access to the child. MaeOla didn’t come forward about her abuse until she became concerned that another young girl in her family could be exposed to the same behavior.<\/p>\n MaeOla, not one to let things fester in adulthood, gathered the family at a retreat in 2004 after their parents had passed. She confronted the issue head-on, revealing her own abuse and calling on everyone in the family to take steps to stop it from happening to anyone else, saying, \u201cI was the first one to start talking about it in the family. They need to know who this person is to protect their own kids.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n When asked why she\u2019s coming forward publicly after so many years, she said she wants to be a voice and advocate for those who are ashamed and fearful about what has happened to them. This is a common response we see in survivors of sexual abuse\u2014a desire to prevent the abuse from happening to others and support them. MaeOla was also inspired by the #MeToo movement to tell her story in the hopes that she can inspire others to address their own abuse and begin working towards healing.<\/p>\n MaeOla\u2019s story, sadly, is not an uncommon one. Many survivors of childhood sexual abuse don\u2019t come forward until years later due to fear of retaliation, suppressed memories, or even fear of damage to their reputation. For MaeOla, being from a rural town in the South where her family was such a bastion of pride in the community made her fear that disclosing her abuse would bring shame to their reputation in the community. \u201cWhy damage the reputation of all of us over one person\u2019s actions?<\/em>\u201d MaeOla remembers thinking.<\/p>\n Despite her experience, MaeOla has fought long and hard for a life full of achievement and enrichment for herself and others. In 2012, she was diagnosed with PTSD from her abuse and the car accident and began regular therapy and medication to help with her symptoms. After a year of treatment, MaeOla decided that she wanted to shift her lifestyle to combat her PTSD without medication, saying, \u201cI started exercising more, eating better and paying more attention to my sleep patterns.<\/em>\u201d These changes proved to be very helpful for her and helped her feel like she had control of her life again.<\/p>\n This lifestyle shift also led MaeOla to begin working on a new initiative, BodyByBolton, which she says, \u201cfocuses on the connection between childhood trauma and health and wellness, including self-esteem, overall healthy habits, balance, nutrition and an optimal <\/em>healthy lifestyle change.<\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n As MaeOla continues her mission to help survivors of childhood sexual abuse and other traumatic experiences, she hopes to see more and more survivors come forward and tell their stories. When they do, she wants to be there to help. She is also launching an advocacy campaign to educate and bring resources to this critical issue. SpeakUpSpeakOut will help free survivors by providing creative platforms to share their stories so that they can move forward and connect to the power to change the narrative of their own lives.<\/p>\n So much of our work at Safe Horizon is to help clients through pain and trauma, but we also get to see the unparalleled strength of survivors in spite of what they have endured. And MaeOla Bolton is no exception.<\/p>\n \u201cI shared my story with Safe Horizon for multiple reasons. The first is that I do not want my life experiences to be in vain. It’s now a part of my life’s work to advocate for and support survivors of sexual abuse and sexual assault as they heal from the inside out. Moreover, I know Safe Horizon is committed to helping survivors of all kinds and to providing a safe place for survivors and their families to get help. I hope that by sharing my story it will encourage others who are ashamed and embarrassed, like I was, to come forward with their stories and seek the support they deserve.<\/em>” #SpeakUpSpeakOut #Healforward<\/p>\n To learn more about MaeOla and her BodyByBolton and SpeakUpSpeakOut initiatives, follow her on Twitter: @MaeOlaB11<\/a> or visit www.bodybybolton.com<\/a><\/p>\n To learn more about Safe Horizon\u2019s services and programs for child abuse<\/a> victims, or to learn the signs, or how to report suspected abuse, please click here.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" MaeOla Bolton, former WNBA Player and sister of Olympic Gold Medalist Ruthie Bolton, opens up about her experience surviving childhood sexual abuse.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":{"id":6221,"alt_text":"MaeOla Bolton_Former WNBA Player Comes Forward to Help Other Childhood Sexual Abuse Survivors","caption":"","description":"","media_type":"image","media_details":{"width":268,"height":240,"file":"2018\/08\/MaeOla-Bolton_Former-WNBA-Player-Comes-Forward-to-Help-Other-Childhood-Sexual-Abuse-Survivors.jpg","sizes":{"thumbnail":{"file":"MaeOla-Bolton_Former-WNBA-Player-Comes-Forward-to-Help-Other-Childhood-Sexual-Abuse-Survivors-150x150.jpg","width":150,"height":150,"mime-type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/MaeOla-Bolton_Former-WNBA-Player-Comes-Forward-to-Help-Other-Childhood-Sexual-Abuse-Survivors-150x150.jpg"}},"image_meta":{"aperture":"0","credit":"","camera":"","caption":"","created_timestamp":"0","copyright":"","focal_length":"0","iso":"0","shutter_speed":"0","title":"","orientation":"0","keywords":[]}},"post":6220,"source_url":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/MaeOla-Bolton_Former-WNBA-Player-Comes-Forward-to-Help-Other-Childhood-Sexual-Abuse-Survivors.jpg"},"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[45],"tags":[727,159,63,987,103,275,105],"class_list":["post-6220","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories","tag-metoo","tag-child-sex-abuse","tag-childhood-sexual-abuse","tag-maeola-bolton","tag-rape","tag-ruthie-bolton","tag-sexual-assault","issue-child-abuse"],"acf":{"page_header_title":"","page_header_excerpt":"","page_header_image":"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/silhouette_hero_image.png","original_url":"","related_initiative_title":"How do we help survivors of child abuse?","related_initiative_link":"\/get-help\/child-abuse\/","related_initiative_link_text":"Learn about our services","featured_posts":[{"ID":5189,"post_author":"13","post_date":"2017-12-26 19:31:15","post_date_gmt":"2017-12-26 19:31:15","post_content":" At our five Child Advocacy Centers (CACs) across the city, children who have experienced child abuse can find a safe space and supportive environment in which to share their story. CACs house specialists from multiple support agencies in one location, reducing the number of times children need to retell details of their abuse and providing centralized wraparound care for children and their families. CACs are staffed with specialists from Safe Horizon, the Administration for Children\u2019s Services, and local pediatricians in addition to partners from the New York City Police Department, the District Attorneys\u2019 offices, and the New York City Law Department.
\nAugust 16, 2018<\/em><\/p>\nMaeOla’s Story of Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse<\/h1>\n
Healing from Trauma, Advocating for Survivors<\/h1>\n
![\"5](\"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/5-Ways-to-Support-Someone-You-Love-Who-Has-Experienced-a-Traumatic-Event-1024x683.jpg\")
\r\n\r\nDecember 26, 2017<\/em>\r\n\r\nThe holidays can bring up all kinds of emotions. If someone close to you shares with you that they have had an experience of abuse or violence, it can be shocking, and often it\u2019s difficult to know what to say. If it happens, here are some ways you can help:\r\n1. Listen Compassionately and Without Judgment<\/h1>\r\nEven when you disagree or don't understand.\r\n\r\nKnow that trauma\u2014 both the experience itself and how its impact stays with us\u2014 can be challenging to communicate clearly to others.\u202f Be patient.\r\n
2. Let Them Guide the Conversation<\/h1>\r\nTry not to interrupt, even though you may be feeling anxious to take action. Asking yes or no questions might force them into an area they don\u2019t want to discuss. Instead, ask open-ended questions and let them decide how they want to answer.\r\n
3. Don't Make Assumptions<\/h1>\r\nAbout how they feel or what their needs are.\r\n\r\nYou can offer options, but avoid telling them what they \"should\u201d do, even with good intentions. Instead, ask how you can be helpful.\r\n
4. Remember that Healing is a Complex Process<\/h1>\r\nTheir experience may be affecting them in ways that might not make sense to you, but are very clear to them. The effects of trauma are both mental and physical, and they are far more complex to overcome than, \u201cTry not to think about it,\u201d or \u201cJust let it go,\u201d even if it occurred a long time ago.\r\n
5. Check in With Them Later<\/h1>\r\nAnd keep in mind that they may not feel like talking at the time.\r\n\r\nIt\u2019s important to let them know that you care, but not to go so far as to make them feel fussed over, or like they are a problem that needs to be managed.\r\n\r\nShare these tips by clicking the graphic below:<\/a>\r\n\r\n
![\"5](\"https:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/5-Ways-to-Support-Someone-You-Love-Who-Has-Experienced-a-Traumatic-Event-212x300.png\")
<\/a>\r\nPlease know that you and your loved one are not alone. If you need to talk, we\u2019re here to listen.<\/h2>\r\nSafe Horizon\u2019s Hotlines operate 24 hours a day, including on holidays. Your call is confidential. Whether you\u2019re in crisis or you\u2019re unsure if your experience constitutes abuse, violence, or crime, we\u2019re here to help. Call 1-800-621-HOPE (4673)<\/a> to speak with an advocate today or visit our Hotlines page for more information<\/a>.","post_title":"5 Ways to Support Someone You Love Who Has Experienced a Traumatic Event","post_excerpt":"Has someone shared with you their experience of abuse or violence? Read our 5 tips on how you can support someone who has experienced a traumatic event.","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","post_password":"","post_name":"5-ways-support-someone-experienced-traumatic-event","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2025-06-10 13:45:20","post_modified_gmt":"2025-06-10 17:45:20","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"http:\/\/www.safehorizon.org\/?p=5189","menu_order":0,"post_type":"post","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"},{"ID":776,"post_author":"4","post_date":"2016-06-08 15:17:34","post_date_gmt":"2016-06-08 15:17:34","post_content":"\n
A safe space for our youngest survivors.<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n","post_title":"Child Advocacy Centers","post_excerpt":"Providing children who have experienced sexual and physical abuse with a safe environment to tell their story and to get support with their family.","post_status":"publish","comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","post_password":"","post_name":"child-advocacy-center","to_ping":"","pinged":"","post_modified":"2025-05-28 11:01:36","post_modified_gmt":"2025-05-28 15:01:36","post_content_filtered":"","post_parent":0,"guid":"http:\/\/safehorizon.harbordev.co\/?page_id=776","menu_order":0,"post_type":"page","post_mime_type":"","comment_count":"0","filter":"raw"}],"title_font_size":"42","sub-headline_placement":false,"custom_scripts":false,"show_author_bio":false},"yoast_head":"\n